thanks for your thoughtful comments. I'm honored that they've brought up conversation on the other side of the world (i think you're reading this from Australia, correct?).

It is odd that so many of our peers are able to overlook either the amateur writing or problematic relationships of the book, and simply get swept away by the fantasy of it. There are certainly narratives (film, books, songs etc) that I love beyond reason that really aren't worth loving- but they still touch me deeply. Whether its bad art or irresponsible storytelling that manages to capture us sometimes- I think all of us, men and women have places where we willingly overlook things because something irrational allows us to love it.

But with Twilight, I ponder less that its something dark in women's hearts that pulls us in, and more that there is a culturally propagated blindness about violence against women. It's so pervasive in so many mediums and cultural representations, that most of us have gone our whole lives without having those paradigms challenged. Patriarchy shapes not only our view of ourselves as women, but influences what arouses us and what ignites our sense of worth and identity. When we are taught that we are weak, being rescued becomes sexy/exciting/admirable. When we are taught that we are over-emotional and irrational, then it's easy to identify with a female character who deeply doubts her own instincts and feels more comfortable placating others than speaking up or protecting herself.

I have some wonderful conversation partners here in Seattle that love these books, and am hoping over the next year to really get to hear the Twilight experience from their perspective. I believe (or strive to believe) that whenever a creative work captures our heart- that there truly is something beautiful at its center that speaks to our human longing and the nobility of our desires- (or portrays an image of God that we recognize within but have not yet seen expressed)- and if I believe that to be true of so many things, then I believe it must be true of Twilight- it cannot be all bad to have swept entire generations of women off their feet. As much as I want to promote conversation, mindfulness and guidance while approaching these texts- especially for young girls- I also want to better understand the heart in this text that has touched so many. I believe it's there. I'm willing to dig for it and listen for it, even as I raise my own angry cautions against the dangerous examples I see the text promoting. I'm trying to be curious- so I'll have more to offer than just criticism- which can easily be taken as judgement upon those who love it. It's hard, but I have hope- even if just in the women who love it- that they can show me not only more about the texts, but more about myself as well.

Thanks for reading- let me know if you do decide to give the Twilight Saga a look- I'd love to know where your journey through it takes you.

Erika

I confess I feel like a terrible feminist for liking them so much. I join you in taking issue with all of the things you mention, but I can't deny the serious, *serious* effect reading the books had on me at the time, and my continued sheer excitement about the movies. For the love of God, I made a 100 song playlist dedicated to Bella and Edward.

Part of me wishes I'd had the same reaction you did to them, but the other part of me wouldn't want to give up the experience that reading them was for me.

Obviously I can't leave a huge comment here trying to explain it. But I can't wait to talk to you more about all this, especially now that you've read everything. You are so damn insightful, it kills me!